Epiphany #26

So I want..I mean really want to be excited about something, anything.
I want to have that thing that motivates me to do something great.
I have a need to do a "thing" I can feel it deep inside yet I have no idea what "it" is.
I don't care if it brings attention to me as a matter of fact I'd rather it didn't.
I just want to make a difference somewhere and to love doing so.
Here I am waiting for it have I missed it?
Here I am with something to give yet I don't know what it is.
Have I done it already? Did I miss it? Will I know it when it comes?
It's just that it feels like I haven't quite made it there yet
Who am I? Who am I?  Whoever that is I want to be the greatest I am that I can be...
Have I touched and changed a life for the better?
Am I hiding from my true self? Probably and I want to shake that off
Although I've been out of work for well over a year. I feel like I have been pulled to my limits.
I'm often sinking in the same spot. I want to be a part of the life that zooms by but I don't want
to get lost in it.
Life was not meant to be a job.
Life should be a joy.
Some of the happenings in life may take some effort but not so hard that you miss the joy of it.
I want to live as if I am in the garden of Eden.
I want to enjoy my time here and to smile from my soul...
If it is too difficult than perhaps it's not for me.
I believe that there is a joy in everything and others seem to believe that if you're happy whilst working than you're not working hard enough; or working at all.